The Argument for Not Pursuing Your Passion

The disillusionment just isn't worth it

One of the reasons I started Maritza’ Musings was because there is so much conventional wisdom that I do not agree with and I wanted a place to investigate that. Many of my titles make bold statements that go against much of what we have been taught and my hope is that it intrigues you and that you’ll investigate these topics with me. I’ve spoken about the nuances around “second chances” and how that isn’t always a good idea. That post reminded me of another age-old nugget of insight and that is that if we love what we do, we’ll never work a day in our lives. Girl, please. Personally, I find this narrative extremely disturbing—a lullaby sung to you by capitalism itself. I also believe that this terrible advice is closely tied to the other archaic proverb we often hear from a very young age: pursue your passion (in the workplace). Now, let’s be clear, I am not discouraging people from pursuing their passions in the form of hobbies, activism, and moments of self-care. I am being particularly critical of when we are told that we should pursue our passion professionally. In the America and its economy of the past, this might have been decent advice, but today? Well, that is just irresponsible counsel. Lastly, I’d like to touch on the fact that pursing your passion in a professional way can also disillusion you, oftentimes ending in utter heartbreak. To put it simply, if you love to read books and you love great stories, don’t go into publishing. You’ll realize that most authors are underpaid and chances are that you are too.

Let’s start with a fact: work is work. It does not matter how much you love it. Regardless of how much you might enjoy the day to day tasks, your relationship with work will consist of highs and lows. You will find yourself inspired on some days and completely stuck on others. On the days that feel slow and dreary, we are very much reminded of the fact that this is a job—this is work. It is only on the days that feel stimulating and wonderful that we convince ourselves that work doesn’t feel like work, today. Capitalism tries to convince people that chasing what they’re passionate about will keep them satisfied. And satisfied is all you need to be for capitalism to work. If an entire society is convinced that work can be as wonderful, if not more wonderful than free time, they’ve created a society that also believes that there is no excuse for low productivity. If you love what you’re doing, you should be firing at all cylinders, right? We strive for that, each and every day, when we feel a sense of toxic gratitude for the work that we do. This happens often in the non-profit space. Employees will tell themselves, and each other, that they are just so fortunate to work at a place that’s values align with their own. “I am so lucky to have this job.” That gratitude can be healthy, undoubtedly. However, it sometimes comes in the form of rose-colored glasses. Suddenly, you’re less inclined to speak out about your low pay, abysmal benefits, and ungodly hours. All because you’re just “grateful.” All because you pursued your passion and when you love what you do, you never work a day in your life.

I’d like to propose an approach that has worked for me. Choose the thing you like the third best. Choose the field that gets you excited but does not necessarily get you up in the morning. The thing that, when the disillusionment comes, won’t destroy you. Won’t dampen the only semblance of optimism you might have left. It leaves room for the things you love the most to take up your most precious time: your free time. This is the time that, frankly, you’re most particular about. At least, I know I am. If we take a deep look into what we do on our free time, we know what our values are, what we believe to be truly important. I choose to read—this brings me a sense of peace and I consider it to be the most wonderful form of self-care that exists. I also write, because I like to connect with others and have discussions about things that I find interesting and important, like politics and women’s issues. I prioritize spending time with friends and family because they fill my cup and make me feel like the best version of myself. I know, from the things that I do when I am not on the clock, that I am someone who seeks deep and loving connection—with others and with myself. I also know that I am interested in great storytelling, political progress, and the ways in which our society can become a better place for women. These are the things that I love the most.

Many of you might already know that I am a curator of modern and contemporary art. Notice how I did not include art at the top. Why? Because I’ve always been hyperaware of how money makes the whole damn art world go round. I’m aware of the ways in which collectors and galleries influence the market, the terrible players within this sometimes extremely greedy and arrogant game. I am not always a fan of the way the art world operates—I’ve already written about its lack of boundaries—and none of it shocks me, none of it hurts me, and that is why it is a safe career choice. The disillusionment is acceptable only when it won’t break your heart. It means that while I am at work, I experience the joys of loving art (don’t get me wrong, I love it deeply!), and while I am deciding what to do with the rest of my time, I am focused on the things that have the power to crush me, even on a daily basis. Now, just to make sure I get this off my chest: art itself is certainly in my top 3. Art itself moves mountains inside of me. Experiencing it is my absolute priority any time that I travel. The business side of the contemporary art world is what I’ve always understood to be, well, immoral in many ways. I’ve known it since I was studying for my master’s degree. Early enough for me to understand what I was getting myself into. Early enough for the disillusionment to have been embedded into my expectations. Although you can make that argument for any of the things that you love, you’ve got to ask yourself: But do I want to?

As someone who follows politics very closely, these aren’t easy days. The current administration has me on edge, to say the least. But the fact that I can tune in and tune out in a way that works for me, the fact that I choose to opt in despite the bad news constantly popping up on my feed—that is just wonderful. If I were knee deep in it in the form of a job, well, that simply wouldn’t work for me. It is the fact that I can distance myself when I want to and participate when it feels right that keeps me happy and keeps me engaged. Not every career is worth marrying in to.

This balance of choosing the "third best path,” for lack of better phrasing, isn’t easy. It does require some self-reflection and honesty. It also feels counterintuitive because we have been conditioned our entire lives to believe that we absolutely must love what we do between the hours of 9am and 5pm. It is hard to deprogram this sort of thinking, I know. But, once you realize that there is enough room in your life for all of the things that you love, the decision becomes less difficult. My choice to steer clear of politics as a career does not mean that I do not have the time to engage with it, quite the contrary. My deep love of books is something that I consider to be so sacred and so pure that I get to experience that connection each and every time that I open a book. It has remained pure, it has remained sacred, all because of where I chose to place it in my life. Choose the path, and the career, that feeds into your fighting spirit, but won’t feel like a fatal injury when you get hit. The thing that feeds your soul but does not have the power to destroy it. The thing that you love but that you’re also completely aware of its flaws. The thing that, when you have a bad day at work, you don’t have to gaslight yourself into believing that you’re ungrateful. The career that you can complain about because that is more honest than pretending that every single day is wonderful, and fun, and flawless. That is no way to live. It is also no way to work.